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Umm…imagine taking your OWN advice for once? Sometimes in life you find yourself positively gagged and then immediately clocked. Honestly, the only thing to do when that happens is to rattle off Buddhist coffee table book platitudes and keep it pushing. That’s the kind of high-brow insights you can expect here in Death Club.

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Remember you are dust!

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Stay in touch with Emily

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In honor of us being avid readers and also never being able to stop talking about things we love, we’ve compiled a list of our favorite books from 2025 for all you true mourners out there.

Izzy’s Picks

Okay, I’ll start. First off, I need to make one thing abundantly clear — I may be a clown, but lord knows I am also deeply sentimental and nostalgic. So when I’m not being the WB frog, I am likely in my chambers consuming content to feed my inner child because she basically runs the show over here. I feel like this reading list certainly reveals that. It’s really giving I Have a Dead Mom. But, without further ado, lets dig in.

Demon Copperhead, Barbara Kingsolver

Y’all, this book has haters. The two people that recommended this book to me could not be more different, and I think that is what intrigued me most about it. It is told from the point of view of Demon, a young man growing up poor in Appalachia under the thumb of the opioid epidemic. I laughed. I cried, a number of times. I sweat, I danced, I had a shot, I ate — and I had many epiphanies. Here is my review on good reads.

Perfect Victims, Mohammed El-Kurd

It was a privilege to read this book. The writing is beautiful and has all the venom and sting needed for this topic. You will want to highlight the entire thing and re-read it regularly. The book begs us to not to lose our humanity, hope, and love in the face of unspeakable loss. Please, for the love all that is holy, read this book.

Braiding Sweetgrass, Robin Wall Kimmerer

I don’t think I would be able to do this book justice if I tried to describe how special it is. Let’s just say, I cried through the whole thing and took notes after each chapter. Something has shifted in me. Read it babe ;-*

Nobody Ever Told Me Anything, Rachel “Steak” Finley

Okay, I’ll admit, I actually read this back in 2022. But when I think of books that really helped me through the initial throes of my grief, I think of this. Steak grew up having to figure out everything on her own, hence the title of the book. She loses her mom around the same age that my little sister lost our mom, plus, a lot of the trauma she endures and coping mechanisms she develops are really #relatable. If you and the person you lost had a complicated relationship, or if you raised yourself, this book is for you.

*Honorable mention* The Goldfinch, Donna Tartt

Uh oh, here comes another coming-of-age Oprah’s book club rec from me :’(

Whatever, this book slapped. I honestly could have skipped reading The Secret History, but I’m grateful I did because it was my gateway to this book. The characters are 5 million times more developed than the Secret History, and you won’t want to leave the world of it either. Do yourself a favor and do NOT google who they cast for their trash movie adaptation. It is yet again about growing up in a cruel world without a mother, untethered to anything, with a fire subplot to take you through all 600 pages.

Kaitlin’s Picks

Not to beat a dead horse but… WE ARE LITERATE NOW!!!! It’s all very exciting. I think my list will be a good compliment to Izzy’s— mine probably is giving more “I have a dead dad and sister,” as well as “I just completed part one of my death doula training.”

First, I’m going to talk about some books I read this year that deal thematically with grief, then some white lady Buddhist recs, then we’ll dive into the “how to die and support someone who is dying” genre for the real grief heads who want to get into the practical, knitty-gritty, emergency manual type shit.

First up, some novels/memoirs about grief:

‘Mrs. Caliban’ by Rachel Ingalls

This is a book my friend Jamie recommended to me when I got back into reading this year (lol) because it is a silly and short book about a housewife who falls in love with a frog man. But I was actually surprised that there were some pretty apt and moving depictions of grief in here. It’s sharp and clever and not overly sentimental or overly leaning into the weirdness of the premise— the author treats it plainly and matter of factly, which actually made the absurdity and subtle emotionality of it work so well. And I cried at the end!! I quite liked it and it flew by and I was surprisingly moved.

‘Things in Nature Merely Grow’ by Yiyun Li

Ok, this book is fuckin’ gnarly. It is about a woman who lost both of her children to suicide, so trigger warning on that, babes. It’s a book about radical acceptance and I had to practice a lot of radical acceptance reading it. It’s really something. Again, pretty quick, so just go ahead and read it, but it’s not for the faint of heart.

‘The Year of Magical Thinking’ by Joan Didion

I’m so sorry to be a basic bitch but this is one of the most harrowingly apt depictions of grief in literary history. Truthfully, I read this in college, but it’s a testament to the book that I am still out here thinking about it all the time. Everything she writes is so deeply true and it’s impossible to feel alone in your grief when you’re reading this. Highly highly recommend if you need to WEEP.

*My Honorable Mention goes to ‘The Secret History’! While it’s not such a dynamic representation of grief, it is technically about a death. But unlike Izzy, I LOVED that book and it was my gateway drug into getting back into reading. I highly recommend if you need something juicy to get your feet wet.

And now for some rapid-fire zen shit for my western Buddhism heads! Simply put, these are the books that helped me stop being afraid to die:

‘Be Here Now’ by Ram Dass - Again, basic as hell. But a must-read for my reincarnation girlies.

‘When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times’ by Pema Chodron - I read this like 3 times after my sister died and it became my emotional support read. ABANDON HOPE!!! <3

‘The Fruitful Darkness: A Journey Through Buddhist Practice and Tribal Wisdom’ by Roshi Joan Halifax - If you’re like me and derive immense comfort from reading the words of gentle Buddhist hospice care ladies who have spent time with various tribes absorbing their ancient wisdom, this is the book for you.

‘The Way of Zen’ by Alan Watts - Like Ram Dass, another OG white guy who brought Buddhism to the West, for better or worse. I love him and I don’t think you can go wrong with this one.

‘How to Die: An Ancient Guide to the End of Life’ by Seneca - Ok, this one’s not Buddhist but I promise the Stoics go hard, too!

Ok, now for the Death Doula 101 reads:

‘Die Wise: A Manifesto for Sanity and Soul’ by Stephen Jenkinson (audiobook recommended!)

This is a fabulous and radically transformative book about death culture and dying in America. Ok— the author is actually Canadian but it really hits the nail on the head when it comes to American fears / attitudes / practices about dying. This book blew my mind and I’ve talked about it on the pod a lot. Stephen Jenkinson talks about “asking a little more from the dying” and I would strongly urge you to let this book ask a little more of you as a reader / human being on this mortal coil. Let it blow your shit open and allow yourself to think about your own death.

‘Anam Cara: A Book of Celtic Wisdom’ by John O’Donohue

If you know me, you know my Irish ass loves a little bit of Celtic wisdom. Read this sweetie cutie book and think about who in your life is your Anam Cara (your soul friend!).

‘Preparing to Die: Practical Advice and Spiritual Wisdom from the Tibetan Buddhist Tradition’ by Andrew Holecek

‘The Five Invitations’ by Frank Ostaseski

Full discloszhe, I haven’t read those last two yet. But they are required reading for my doula training, so those two are next up for me!

P.S. Izzy is manifesting a new mic for 2026, please continue to bear with us at this time!

Follow us on Good Reads now that we're literate:

Izzy's Good Reads

Kaitlin's Good Reads

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Here is our very humble attempt to discuss some very complex issues: losing friends to gun violence, getting sober after growing up with substance abuse as the norm, institutional disenfranchisement, and the horrific downstream effects of the US gov’s domestic and foreign policy. We’re sitting down with comedian Timmy Tootle, who kindly opened up to help us try and tackle the intricacies of grief around these topics, while still finding ways to laugh through the tears. 

You can find Timmy Tootle's comedy on his instagram.

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Happy Birthday Izzy :~)

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Learn more about Crystal's work here.

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To listen to the full episode, subscribe to our Patreon here.

To learn more about Raya, click here. Raya is also a contributor to the beautiful Grief Studies Zine. You can pre-order a copy here.

Links for topics discussed in the episode:

1. Fariha's Grief Studies class. 

2. The 6 stages that structure the class and the book are sourced from  6 stages of dying by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross and David Kessler and the processes of decolonization by Poka Laenui.

3. Folks can order a Grief Studies book here. 

4. An essay for Kernel Mag where Raya expands her thesis on the politics of grief and the potential of worldbuilding in its liminality. 

5. A grief ritual offering of Raya archived online for folks who want to practice a grief ritual (with an invitation to gather your friends to do it with you)

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You can find more information about Scarlett on her website and her Substack.

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Remember you are dust

xoxo